Road to Victory

.....

「喪失」に流す涙は
My tears that fell for my loss

耐えてた苦しみにも流れる
Will also flow when I endure this agony.

誰もが見殺すかのよう
Just like everyone else who deserted you,

目蓋を閉じる
I close my eyelids.

2006 Standing Tour Nameless Liberty Six Guns Limited Edition [First Press]
where are you?

I had hard time sleeping the night before. (Rolling on my bed some more)
Something was wrong with my stomach, no idea what is.
May be she was right, I need to go "da zam!" ~.~

ルキ: There is no barrier between us. =)

Enjoy this song by YUI!


(This video is rare at the moment since its really new. MUST WATCH!)

If you're feeling familiar with the song...
You should be wondering if you have watched Kaiji.

Check it out!
Love it!

The Diamond

YaPPa!

I just got an email sent to a special friend in Japan. She's been a great e-pal and regretfully I had kept her waiting for the reply for about 4 months or so and decided to do it just then. Missed her lots (^^). We very much promised to exchange little gifts on our respective birthdays but somehow I failed to do so on her birthday last March (for some reason, I couldn't), so I basically did also apologize to her as part of the lengthy mail that I've just sent. ごめんなさい ~

She really does remind me alot of my love one and as usual, my letter will be translated and sent by her to him. Sometimes, love IS the third language ( lingua franca) between 2 individuals, because it doesn't matter how different our mother tongues are, miraculously, the signals just go through! I'm so glad we're still so near at heart, despite watching from far. Never have I been this blissful. Okay, I know nobody would give a damn.

我々はただの友達に運命づけられた場合でも、私は全然気にしない.何が最も重要なのはあなたが歌う見ることができることです.あなたがいなくて寂しい.あなたは私が今まで知っている最も明るい星です.がんばって！

That must be hilarious, no? (-_-)

Well, when I get withdrawn, pieces and pieces of pictures came into my head and I start going off about things that are unlikely to occur ever in my lifetime -__- Okay, its like sometimes what I used to tell my friends - I fantasize alot, but mind you all - it's totally not daydreaming. I remember most of the time getting real emo and how I'd hug my knees and keenly distressing to my feelings and it all leads to poignant anxiety, really. Sometimes, I wished imaginary friends were for real. HA.

By all odds, I don't look like temperamental psycho kid, do I? At least I know that's not even one thing close to my own nature. It could be of something more scientifically related illness I reckon, such as the hormone imbalance symptoms. Don't ask me, google it dang. There should be some kind of relation to it. To be even typing all these shitz out at this ungodly hour has evidently shown the break out of the disease ( or whatever it may be).

Life is too real, too brief, too concrete like I once said before.
Even Fluffy is feeling all crestfallen ahah!


Oh now I feel so wimpy.

Anyways, having so much unhappy encounterments sometimes does contribute to these symptoms... and unknowingly, it makes me realize how important he is to me because he kept me breathing all these while when I break down and cry at times. Thanks Dad. He simply possesses that super power and I don't know why. =)

I'm getting drowsy now.

(Not a word in the letter can prove that true feelings I have for you, because its real)
人生は短い場合, 私はあなたにそれを捧げる

Stupidity

I just got back home (Malacca)... and Fluffy is all moody again.
Poor hammie, and he didn't want to get his picture taken at all.
Hopefully my brother can make him feel better tonight.

Also, I just got my set of photostated books (3) today. Which is very very bulky!! I'm wondering how am I supposed to bring them back by Sunday. Oh boy. I might just bring one back at a time or if not there's a possibility that I may just faint on the way back to my apartment, which is not going to happen.

RM115 to have all 3 thick books photostated. Wadda...
At least I saved half from what I could have spent on those 3.

You know... I got too bored with the entire assignment thingy so I decided to make use of my sticky notes for abit.

So...

oh well... I decided to save some more for my "to-be-found" artistic skill la.. ~___~''
I have some other colours one that I really like too ( so decided not to waste la haha).

Surprisingly, many of us look astonishingly different today @ college and somehow just did startled the others a little. HAHAHA. Too bad Mr tick have yet to have the picture sent over. Its just basically me with eyeliners on (and Sandra with her exceptionally blingy top), like for the very first time to college! Well yea I wanted to try on something different... that's all.

...but I thought I didn't look really good on those, not that it makes much of a difference anyway. So, I still prefer my original double eyelids. x)

On the bus

" I guess not "
-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+

and what the hell, I watched KAIJI and I'd rate it 5/10. Reasons? It's a little too draggy here and there plus overall its just doesn't have a good plotting. and wth? Kenichi was on there for few minutes and then BAM plunged to death the next minute, that WAS damn disappointing! I thought he started to look really good in there, lolx. EVERYTHING was just over-acted then.

What to do - its a story depicted from a Manga.
Thank god I went alone. ^_^

So anyway... that's like some of my narcissism and a little of what I thought of the movie I had so much hope on. =__=

Sweat ON~
Good night ^^

Tokio Hotel (20/04/2010)

According to my personal calendar...
There would be many upcoming birthday events in May and just when I thought I felt a bulge on my purse... wada!! Why does it seem like my wealth is put to a limit as though a curse has befallen me. Such dark curse, GOD what have I done wrong!!

...this evidently shown that there are "blood"-suckers on the loose for the month!!
POOR PURSE LA!


So...the kick-ash BRAWL to start off the month???

No Lady Gaga, the one that stings (for once)...

and boy no Justin Bieber for godsake.

Look, remember the pop-rock band who took home the Best New Artist accolade in 2008 ( being known for its eclectic and versatility and cool vocals! ) and has a frontman who isn't too ditty of his flamboyance? ... and for all you know, they're German!

den den deng~~~

Hey, its TOKIO Hotel!
*staring at the anime-esque big-hair dude*
You just gotta love him- Bill Kaulitz! =]

They're the emo punks, with personality.

They are coming ... they ARE COMING (despite all odds) and I'm pretty sure they're prepared to put on some real stunning performances on the stage for their Malaysian fans =) as we celebrate the annual labours' day. For some reason, it got me pumped-up. In fact I just got to know about this dazzling band not too long ago.

I would have been really ecstatic if it were The Gazette who're coming (being such a Gazette-fiend myself) but then how many western rock bands were there before that had set to perform in this what I'd call an Islamic-orthodox country la. Of course Gazette would have been too much then.....

Anyway, here's something to share 'bout them.



//CHORUS//

There's no real love in you
There's no real love in you
There's no real love in you
Why do I keep loving you

It's automatic,
Counting cars on a crossroad
They come and go like you
It's automatic,
Watching faces I don't know
Erase the face of you //////

Aint it good? ^_^

The thing is, if you're listening to music, you have got to fall for it firsthand. That's how I interpret them.

.....

ah, I'm actually at the downturn point right now in the mood.
It happens once in awhile and its totally normal as it seems.
Really, human emotions are uncanny.

Sometimes I just cant express myself decently enough or in other words, I'm beyond some emotional response. Get it?? Great... ( get what I meant? If you can't, that's what I mean.) =.=

Just to announce before-hand...there'll be more great happenings coming up in JULY. I seriously don't mean my birthday. Something else, you see... =] I'll be posting on them as they all come along. OHohoOHO.

have a great NIGHT!

14/04/2010

It's another new week...
I've been working hard over last weekend. kudos!
We hit the target of our last day of working... its not easy I'm telling you! Everyone was frantically pushing the sales and probably for once, I find children super annoying... and rude! They treat you like idiot distributing samples and they grab bundles of our samples without asking and stomped through me and shoulder everybody like nobody's business!

Plus plus they refer me as "Oi / Ei / Auntie!" with no courtesy.
Mind your manners kiddos!
I am never going to put up with that !

I can only conclude that this is one hell of a working experience.
But I'm bound to accept more of such part-time job to occupy my free weekends wisely + earn some bucks as extra pocket money for myself ^0^. I thought that's something that I am capable of doing before I scale back my hour for the incourse works.

Yes yes, speaking of assignments, they are coming and just so you know, they are mad crazy! Heavy workloads, extremely tedious and insane criterias. Not to mention that the lecturers have really high expectation of us as well. In just the 3 months - 6 freaking assignments - few with presentations. I guess my coming days aren't so bright no more eh.
and my FYP will be shit TENSE!
argh!! I need my dose I need my dose ~

However, I find my current timetable rather appropriate for me to have more commitment towards my incourse. Although Tuesday is still very much a killer-day. So what I'll do is basically take a deep breath every Tuesday morning and run through the day as any other day, except, with much reluctance. ^0^ I can't afford to miss anything important within this time frame, therefore, I will start my works with the right momentum and as far as possible try my best to maintain them.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

(monologue)
What happen when there's group assignment?
-I was put into a very tough position.-

and WHY is that?
-because I'm too good-hearted-

wt*=.= So what happened?
-I'm stucked la. I have no power over who to pick from and absolutely no right to do changes.-

So?
-so... I'll see dark clouds everyday, certain evil eyes shining at places and never sweet dream in the sleep.-

What should you do then?
-Hand the responsibilities to my assistant CEO.-


At my level, at times, its inevitable that conflicts and politics are happening. To me, I choose be 90% neutral is not 100%, or in short, just basically be a good listener and prevent the mouth from speaking too much of unnecessary buzz. What can I say? This is pure life!

Anyway, its Wednesday today and yes I'll be off back home by tomorrow with a cousin.
I need the comfort...
I miss my parents...
I miss my grandma...
and nonetheless my siblings...

After having conversations with TST, she seemed to be in despair over some family matter. I wished I could have done something, but oh well this is totally out of my control. So I let her pour out everything and make her feel better.

You see, it's important to always have contact among family members to make sure the message/feelings conveyed is well receive.

Aight..2 more hours to go before its time to leave home.
It's a mad morning today. -Bustling-

Remember to have an umbrella with you everyday!
It rained almost everyday recently.

A Fully Occupied Week ;)

Hay Low!

I'm sorry for the late post, but I'm pretty tight with my schedule recently. You must be wondering why. So...

In the weekdays (Mon-Wed), besides the fairly-packed timetable at college, I'll also need to manage my Zoo, Farm and Hotel (if you know what I mean and its pretty obvious that I'm addicted). Thurs is my spring-cleaning day of course and what I do is basically featherdust, wipe, sweep, mop and watch my room sparkle at the end of the day...^^ and finally Fri, Sat and Sun, you'll find me promoting Breathe Right Kids at PWTC for an average of 8 hours+ each day.

So there goes a WEEK.

Well, the week started fine until Friday comes lolx.

Because my feet are hurting me to shiz... but hardwork comes with good pay =)

*crank* b-but....look, today is my first day working and I had real hard time there already and tomorrow is a Saturday to come, spare me!

Can't wait for Sunday though, becoz my greatest cousin will be having dinner with me!

I told him I might be alittle late for dinner (just in case I need to put up with the touch ups or any last words from the supervisors) and he said its fine and he'll still wait for me to savour our steamed FISH together!!! African Steamed Fish wor... love it to bits!****

HaHaHa....and I wanna balik Kampung NEXT weekend!! Gonna plan ahead!

I guess more good things are coming except that I still have some tutorial works to do.

oh Great, I don't even know where I should start from.

*tired*

I'll see ya!

I am who I am

There was this somebody who talked to me about my past, very surprisingly. It came to me that I've totally forgotten them but I definitely never expected that coming like a gun shot. A whole lot of flashbacks were flickering through my head and I ...

"....old times...."

There were mistakes which cannot be mended. Wrongs that can never be corrected. I may not be given the chance to relive my life but as far as I know, I am here, still breathing - for a purpose.

我也许一辈子也不会知道我真正生存的意义是什么，但至少我了解这世界上的每一个人都很努力的在活着。

It felt tinges of sadness recalling the turbulence of past but its good to refresh and pick up what is lost.

-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-STITCHES-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-

Waaa...I can't be any more grateful that I finally got a job to spend my weekend. *thank u bomu* At least besides rushing home to hometown, I've got more productive stuff to do! Not too shabby... for a loafer like me.

I'm starting to get pumped weeee~!

This semester comes along with loads of presentations stuff to do, don't know if its actually a good thing, but ohhh well. One way or the other, it works as a good driver for students for the start, at least that's what I think.

An hour back... I had satay celup.
*gRin*

-huei huei ?-
wt_!
don't make me do it
>.<